Sexy Slogans With a Bite

Some risqué slogans that follow Bon Appétit’s recent “Bite Me” campaign.

While the rest of us have been fretting over search engine optimization (SEO), social media and apps, the folks at Bon Appétit magazine have recognized the true cure for what ails our industry: Sex.

Bon Appétit put this in practice in two little words: "Bite me." Owned by Condé Nast, the magazine got a lot of buzz with its recent promotional campaign using that suggestive slogan.
I recommended in my blog, Dead Tree Edition, that other magazines also adopt slightly naughty "me" slogans, offering "Smoke me" for Cigar Afficionado, and for Rolling Stone "See me, feel me, touch me, heal me."

Readers responded with numerous "helpful" suggestions for magazines wanting to jump on the "Bite Me" bandwagon. Below are some of the best ideas, with Tyler Reed of TheSideBarReview.com and Deborah Corn of PrintMediaCentr.com leading the way with multiple entries.

(Editor's note: Mr. Tree, who has lived a somewhat sheltered life in the forest, had to look some of these expressions up—and not in Merriam-Webster. If you think these proposals are tasteless, you should have seen what we censored—Mr. Tree is posting the uncensored version on his blog at http://bit.ly/mbqqls, if you're feeling a bit daring. What kind of perverts read Dead Tree Edition anyway?)

Consumer Publications

• Allure: Lure me.
• O! The Oprah Magazine: Me! Me!
• Time: Time me.
• Consumer Reports: Rate me.
• The Knot: Tie me up.
• AARP The Magazine: Wake Me.
• National Enquirer: Stalk Me.
• Sports Illustrated: Play with me. (Editor's note: Mr. Tree included a tasteless reference to spherical objects that are used in most sports, but he got called for a personal foul.)
• ESPN The Magazine: Let me get to first base. (Editor's note: Mr. Tree wanted to go farther, but was caught stealing.)
• Football Digest: Throw me a forward pass. (Editor's note: Mr. Tree's version includes a reference to a tight end, but we benched him.)
• Bargain Hunter Magazine: Tell me I'm cheap.

Of course, enthusiast titles can be just as sexy as the big-circulation titles. For example: